A glimmer of hope has come my way, finally. It seems the zoloft may be kicking in. For the first time in months I actually *felt* like doing something. I didn't do it because I had to or to suit others, etc. I did it because I mentally felt like doing it. I went through one old trunk, emptied it to give to my daughter. Consolidated some of what I took out into another one which was almost full. What is left out is my other daughter's artwork from years ago; it will all go to her as part of her Christmas present. We now need something at the foot of our bed, a table or bench, but we'll find one in good time. For now, we have an armchair there holding the ubiquitous laundry basket full of clean clothes which never seem to get put away.
This morning, apparently, I needed to sleep more. We had to go run a couple of errands after breakfast, so off we went. I fell asleep. Rog, bless his heart, knows I get my best sleep in the car, have done for years, but only if he's the one driving. Anyway, he took me up on our usual Sunday loop, up on the palisades (bluffs) among the peach, apple, pear, and cherry orchards. It is high above the Colorado river and I feel better when we get up above the valley, so I usually stay awake to watch, but I have no memory of this morning's ride except that the sleep felt really good and the dog was very happy. He loves his rides, too.
Anyway, my eyes are sore, really tired, but my mind is slightly clearer. It feels as though a fog is lifting in tatters, here and there, from my mind. I had to stop with Rog's reminder that I need to keep things in balance. I have a tendency to go great guns when I feel better; beyond what I should do, then I crash. Not this time, though...I stopped, then we went for a bit. This evening, I have felt a little let down, energy-wise, but no anxiety, no lethargy, no panic, no xanax...bless me, god/dess and wake me up and thanks!
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